Readoption

Yesterday, we were able to have Gracie's foreign adoption "recognized" by our state. Some call this "readoption". It was a quick and painless process thank goodness. Some states make it really difficult with a waiting period and all kinds of hoops but not so here. This also enabled us to change her name. Today I mailed the forms to the vital statistics dept. so that a new birth certificate can be issued with her permanent name. So my sweet girl will heretofore and forever be known as the fair "Noelle Grace". There's a debate raging on the forum regarding whether or not to retain your child's Ethiopian name. The name that Gracie was given I did not like.....at all. As her parents, hubby and I reserve the right to choose her name and that's what we did. For others who choose to keep the Ethiopian name I say that's wonderful, each family has to make their own decisions. What I don't care for is the self righteous attitude that some people adopt when it comes to this. Gracie is OUR child, any decisions made concerning her will be based on our beliefs, concerns, wants and or needs etc. I sometimes feel other APs put to much emphasis on the child's birth family. Constantly showing the child the life dvd, placing pics of the birth family in the child's nursery etc. Now for older children this may be a pertinent thing to do. However, I can't see how it benefits a child that you adopted as a young infant. I think it would be far wiser to focus on your relationship with the child instead of constantly reinforcing the image of the birthfamily . I am not Gracie's babysitter, second mom, stepmom, second best mom whatever. I am her mother, period. When the time comes we will tell our sweet baby girl everything we know about her birthmother and do our best to answer any questions she may have. However, I refused to have her entire life revolve around her genetic beginnings. Smooches